Tips on improving yourself

As I walk through each day of life, I ask myself the same question - What am I doing?

This might sound a bit weird to you as I seem to have no idea on what I am doing. However, I don’t mean I have no idea on what’s going on. What I meant was “what is the purpose of doing that” or “is this the right thing to do”. Sometimes I get angry over my family members or annoyed because a friend did something which disturbed me a lot. The overwhelming emotions lead me to nowhere but negative thoughts.

 Sometimes, I read books and then suddenly think about “WHY” I am reading this book and what do I want to learn from it. There are so many things that I do which I don’t know my motive behind. There are so many things that I don’t know how to respond to. There are so many problems that I don’t know which thing to tackle first.

Everyday, signifies a new day of opportunities and a new day of problems, to all of us. We laugh, we cry, we smile, we moan. Our days are packed with emotions, fears and anticipation. Sometimes, it is just hard to know WHICH thing we should do first and WHAT response we should be making. I don’t know if it has something to do with my religion, but somehow since October, I began to think more about my ways of coping with things. When someone gets angry about me, do I argue with him/her? When someone is sad, what’s the best thing to say? Am I saying this just to look good?

Sometimes I get the answers but sometimes I don’t. Although questioning myself might not be 100% effective, but I am sure that SOME of the unnecessary arguments has been avoided and I have learned to live a better life. I’ve learned to be kind and be a LITTLE more true, to myself and to everyone around me.

I know this might seem very vague and might not even teach you a valid way of improving yourself, but it is a precious lesson of mine that I really would like to share with all of you.

Before you do anything, ask yourself - why are you doing it? Is it good to anyone? Question yourself more and reflect yourself more. By this, you would be able to improve yourself through constant self-reflection.

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Do your part 1.8.2015

“Do your own part” - a message that God has given me last night. I’m not sure if this is going to have a long caption but I will type exactly what comes out from my mind, not deliberately shorter or longer.



What does do your own part mean. Firstly, people say God will help you through. Yes, no doubt He will help you through. but with one condition. WHAT? A CONDITION? Yes, a condition. That is, you yourself, have to do your own part first. Think about it, you ask for God to help you pass a hard exam but you don’t even study. Do you think God would just suddenly make you 10000 times smarter and pass every single exam? No, He won’t. He needs you to give your best, and leave the rest to Him. If you don’t even make an effort to work with Him, do you think you will accept His help?



I don’t know if my account has non-believer followers, or any non-believers have come across, but if you don’t believe in my God, does that mean you don’t have to do your own part? NO. You still have to play your own role and try your best. Although you are not ready for God, God is waiting for you. If you try just once to pray to Him (on the condition that you have done your part and you are submitting your whole heart to Him), He will change you for the good.



Do your own part has another meaning to me (which is the message God gave me) - do not be affected by what others have done wrong. Stay in your spot even if others have an advantage just because they achieved in wrong ways. Remember my “giving to get” post? There are people who socialize with certain people just to build connections and to get helped when they need them; there are students who copy homework to get good grades; there are people who ask for and suddenly get a boost in number of followers. It might be harsh at first to see “Why does he know so many people?” “Why does she get good grades?” or “Why did she suddenly get more followers than I did?” These things all bother us so much. These may not be the exact case you have but there are things that bother us but no matter how many times we warn others, no one listens.



God taught me that I should focus more on what I have to do. As long as I have warned others, that is enough. (I may not be able to 100% do this because sometimes I still get bothered when people do things in “bad” ways but I’m gradually reminding myself more so that I can focus more on what I need to do for the society) I have done my part and only focusing on others mistakes would only bring negative emotions. The best way I could do is to help others and remind them to do things in the right way, then leave it to them to decide. That’s the best way to get things right in my life.


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This turned out pretty long but I hope you all like it!

Count your blessings

We always compare our possessions with others'. We see others get good results and we want them too. We see others wearing the trendiest clothes and we which we could get them too.

There are so many things that we wish we could have in the world. And, the undeniable truth is that, someone will always be prettier, someone will always be more handsome, someone will always be smarter. So, there is no point of comparing as you will always find things people have but you don't have. So...why not count your blessings?

If people have things you don't have, you would have things that people don't have too. I was chatting with my friends yesterday and it just suddenly hit me how big a blessing it was to have them by my side. Some people feel bad about not being treated as a "best friend", but it took me a while to realize, it didn't matter. If you have friends to talk to, friends to share with and friends to hang out with, it wouldn't matter if they treated you as a BEST friend. You are a friend and you mean something to them. That's all that matters isn't it?

We too often overlook what we have and stare at what others have.

"The seaweed is always greener, in somebody else's lake"     - The Little Mermaid

Yes, it's a Disney quote, but it does mean a lot to me. It is a reminder that we always think what others have are better than ours and others think that ours' are better than theirs'. Now think about it, if you and your friend exchanged EVERY SINGLE POSSESSION you guys had, how would you feel?

It's easy to say " it'd be pretty good" but it's hard to really think that way when it really happens.

Remember, every one of us is unique and every one of us has something special. We should not count others' blessings but OUR blessings for that is a way towards happiness.

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Don't give to get

I was browsing through different blogs and came across this awesome blog which mentioned about giving to get.

There is a story about two brothers, which the first brother gave the second brother many presents on Christmas Day while the second brother gave the first a gift from the heart - a photo with both of them together. The first brother was pretty upset since he expected to get more gifts in return.

This of course does not only apply to Christmas times when we exchange presents but applies to many areas. There are times people share things with friends so that their friends would like them more; there are times when people chat with each other just to build up connections; there are people that offer help because they want to be helped in return.

All these kind of things are giving to get. I often question myself - "Why am I doing this?", "Is it for myself or really for others?" Sometimes I get the answer, sometimes I don't. I don't want to lie to you, there are times I feel like I'm giving to get, though when I do community services I'm usually not expecting anything in return.

"Generosity is measured by what motivates you to give"

It is often easy to give but it is hard to make sure you are doing it with the right purpose. It is hard to ensure you yourself are really trying to help instead of gain something (even if it's just a little) in return.

As this new year starts, I will keep on questioning my motive behind everything I do and hopefully, I can transform myself into a better person.


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Happy New Year!

Goodbye 2014. It's been a year that flew by, a year that contained a lot of sweet and bitter memories. In the coming year, I want to reach out to more people and help them. I want to be kind to everyone, including those who dislike me or are mean to me.

It is often hard to be nice to others when they are mean to us. When they treat us badly, we would immediately want to take revenge. However, in the end, we don't want to be the bad guys who ill-treated people just because they did not treat us well. Revenge would only bring regrets and disturbance. Don't fall into the temptation and say the wrong things just because you are angry! Life is short, we should learn to love more and forgive quickly. Even though we may not receive anything in return, we would at least be happy about what we've done and NOT regret about anything.

I've been blessed to be helped by so many people and I hope to spread the love and make the world a better place :)

The past is gone so there is nothing more to mourn about. 2015 is a fresh new start for everyone. It's a new page in our life and a perfect time for us to correct our mistakes and get everything right.

I hope you all will have a great year ahead and have your resolutions planned! Happy New Year and May God bless you and your family!